My name is David and I'm 16 years old. All my life I grew up in a
Christian home and was taught to be a good Christian boy. All my life, I
took salvation as something I had because of how I grew up. Boy, was I wrong.

It needs to be said that I am very intelligent. I don't mean to brag, but
it's very true, the Lord blessed me with no other talents but my intellect.

In sixth grade I became my own person. I began to create my own views on
life and to become very opinionated. At school, I hung out with my friends
and built my reputation. At home, I played the piosity game. I used my
smarts to learn the facts about the Bible so I could talk the talk better
than most, so my theology would be so firm that my parents wouldn’t know I
didn't know God at all. I was a Pharisee.

I wasted four years of my life like that. During that time I became bitter,
angry, prideful, and absolutely lustful. I became an actor beyond compare,
putting on the charade of religion and never giving God the time of day.
Then I hit May of my freshman year.

The High School Leader at my church is the pastor's wife, and I've never
met a woman like her. She remembered my name, after only seeing me once,
and she genuinely loved me. I would see her and she would run to me,
excited just to say hi. She was the driving force that took me to an RV
high school trip. Her, my friend and present small group leader, and
another amazing girl brought me face to face with Christ.

That was a year and a month ago. I don’t know how to put it, but that week
at the beach transformed me. I met the first girl I ever loved, and found
my first true heartbreak. I met some of the most amazing people, and saw
the depths of what an awful person I was. That week transformed everything.

I’ve since become a follower of the Lord, but the burdens of life still
grab me. I still fall into my old life. I often find myself putting on the
“religious” face when I’m deeply burdened, or I fall into my arrogance.

The Lord has given to me an extremely sensitive spirit, so that I weep
often, and often am hurting from the pain of others or just from my own
trials. I live with a burdened heart for most of my days, and never seem
to find happiness.

As I look at my life now, I realize that even though I am often hurting or
sad, I am happier now than I ever was before. I now have a new hope that
burns within me. I have someone who actually understands me constantly
with me. Though I am burdened by sorrow I have the peace of Christ dwelling
within me. Though I am a wretched and wicked man, I have Christ in me, and
He’s not going to stop refining me, He’s going to finish all He started in
me. God is amazing, He loves even me, the most unlovable there ever could
be. I am so thankful for His mercy and grace, and I beseech everyone who
reads this to never, ever don't the mask of hypocrisy that I often wore. It
leads only to sorry and heartache, and even worse, it defames God.


Your Brother In Christ
David

"All things work together for good for those who love Christ Jesus"