I have to say that I could write you a book about my life, all of which would
depress you, some would down right shock you, but I will not. I will keep this
as short as possible.
I felt different all my life. Being the last of four female children, I became
the tom-boy out of all of them. I followed my father around everywhere he went.
When my sisters were inside learning to sew, I was outside learning to change
the oil in the car. And at 17, I started to have kidney problems that would
plague me for the next 16 years. I ended up having one of my kidneys removed.
My biggest problem though wouldn't be my health, it was the fact that I was very
confused about being very manly, to the point that I dated women.
It seemed that every time that I started to date a woman, God would call me to
church. I spent 11 years dating the same woman on and off, each time returning
to the church. Please don't stop reading. I am very happy to say that I have been
living on my own for a year and a half, and I have returned to the church.
Most would say that it will not last, but for some reason this time I feel
completely different. I love the Lord more than I have ever loved anything in my
life. I want very much to tell everyone what He has done for me. I don't have the
confusion that I once felt. I don't have the feelings I once had. My life is
finally where I want it to be. (My family could use some help though.)
As far as my health goes, I recently found out that I have thyroid and liver trouble.
When I told my oldest sister that I was sick and it could turn out to be serious,
she became angry with me when I said I didn't care if it was serious or not
because I was ready to leave this earth. (She doesn't attend church) I couldn't
be more ready to go to my new home.
My mother recently left my ailing father, on their 42nd wedding anniversary. I go
to his house daily and we talk about the Bible. My father is the only family
member, as of right now, that I may count on seeing in Heaven. He has been a
Christian for many years. He waited patiently while I lived out my wild life,
praying for me daily. He knew with Christ all things were possible.
Though my family has all went their separate ways, I am headed in the right
direction. I have finally made it to the path that leads to life eternal and I
am proud to say that my life is the best it has ever been. Sickness and all, I
thank God for His gracious forgiveness...SJS |