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I grew up in the home of an unsaved alcoholic father. My mother was also
unsaved. My grandmother was a devoted Christian who played the organ at
the Akron Baptist Temple in Ohio. Unfortunately she passed to Heaven when
I was quite young so I never really knew her - only knew of her. My first
introduction to "church" was when I was around 12 years old. An
acquaintance of our family (who happened to be a Mennonite lady) invited
my brothers and I to the Vacation Bible School that was being held at
their church.
My little brother & I attended that week and learned the books of the
Bible. We began attending church with this good lady and her family every
Sunday. It was different.... they did not use any music during their
services. I remember as a young girl wondering why the women all wore
"doilies" on their heads. They were very good people and very good to me.
I stayed in their home many times & thought it was odd that they gathered
at the table in the morning before school to read the Bible and pray. I had
never experienced such a thing.
During the fall of 1974 I attended a Ford Philpot Conference with this
family. I remember the man preached in the gym of the local high school and
it was attended by hundreds & hundreds of people. On Friday night of that
week there was a special push for teens. I went along with several of my
friends. He did give an altar call after the message. I went at the urging
of my friends (not the Holy Spirit). Someone took me back to a little area
and showed me the Bible and I'm not sure what else happened. At any rate I
hung on to that experience for more than 12 years as my Salvation experience,
not understanding that Salvation is a personal relationship with Christ.
During this year my father's drinking continued to worsen. I remember every
Friday night, it was my job to call all the bars in town to try and find my
father before he drank up all the grocery money. A man that worked with my
father at a local egg hatchery began to take an interest in our family. He
invited my parents many times to his church (also a Mennonite church). We
lived in small farm town in Indiana that was HEAVILY populated by Amish &
Mennonite folks. My brothers & I switched to that particular church to join
their youth group & get involved in all the activities. We started praying
that our parents would come to church. After many months of praying & waiting
at the church doors to see if they would keep their "promise" - one day it
finally happened!
I saw my father and mother walking up the steps to the church! I
was elated! We didn't attend there very long. I mentioned my Baptist
Grandmother earlier...my father had gone to a Baptist church when he
was young. He didn't care for the Mennonite way. They never gave an
altar call - he didn't agree with that. They didn't use the King James
Bible - he hated that. Several other reasons caused him to start looking
around for a good Baptist church. He finally found out about a "baby"
Baptist church that was holding services in the basement of a bank. We
attended one of their very first services. BOY! What a difference that
was for me! They had music! What a spirit I felt that night!
They seemed so happy in the Lord. We continued to attend there and
before too long they were able to move into their own building. During
this time my parents both "rededicated" (I would call it reformed)
their lives to the Lord (many years later they were both gloriously
SAVED!) A couple of years after attending this church they called a
new Pastor. He had 6 children. I became best friends with his oldest
daughter and my older brother became buddies with his oldest son. This
oldest boy - Darren was quite the city slicker and I was just a country
"bumpkin". We didn't quite hit it off at first, but eventually we all
became fast friends and were together often.
I fell in love with the Preacher's son - Darren. We began to "date" and
later on he went off to college. Well that was just too much for a young
man - all those single "chicks" up there and he, a handsome, young single
guy! He did the heart-breaking thing when he came home for a visit! As
the Lord would have it though, he came home for the Summer and injured
his back and was not able to return to school in the fall as he had to
have back surgery. I thought it would be kind to help fill his recovery
time with some visits. So I visited every day! Of course I was still very
much in love with him. Well, the Lord directed our paths and in 1980, He
brought us blissfully together in marriage!
Almost as soon as we were married we were flung into the ministry! I
knew that he had the call of God on his life, but I was so young and
immature..... We both agreed that it was God's will for us to have a
family though, so we didn't wait until we could "afford" children, else
we probably would have never had them! My father-in-law, Phil Tharp, one
of the Godliest men I know, a man I dearly love, has always been very
vocal, very involved in his children's lives. When he found out that we
were expecting our first baby (his first grandbaby!) he showed me a
Bible verse: "Notwithstanding, she shall be saved in childbearing, if
they continue in faith and charity and holiness with sobriety". Then
he said, the best thing you can do for yourself and that baby that you
are carrying, is to keep your heart right with the Lord.
I took what he said to heart. I thought about it constantly. During this
time we had been showing the "rapture" films to our teens - "A Thief in
the Night" and all those. Those films really make you stop and think
about your condition. I began to examine myself - as the Bible says to
do. I started to doubt. I shook it off. The Holy Spirit came back again
and again..... I became very troubled at the thought of the rapture and
whether I was really saved or not. I could not remember what took place
that night back in 1974. That really bothered me..... why couldn't I
remember what Bible verses that lady had shown me? Did I pray? And if I
did pray, what was it that I said? Shouldn't I remember all this, if it
was real to me? Was I a Phony?
I began to lose sleep at night. One day during the Summer (we had been
married for several months and I was about 6 months along in my pregnancy)
I came home from my mothers house after doing laundry all day. When I
came in, I called for my husband.... no answer..... no note......
nothing....... my heart skipped a beat. I went into the bedroom to see
if maybe he was resting. What I saw made my heart stop! I saw laying on
the bed, his shirt in a heap, his pants draped over the side and his
shoes on the floor by the drooping pant legs!! I thought the rapture had
taken place and I had been left behind! After a few quick phone calls, I
discovered he only gone out for a quick swim with his brothers! What
relief! But with that relief came an even larger flood of guilt and doubt
about my condition before the Lord.
I felt guilty because of my fear of the rapture. Why would one of God's
children be afraid to meet her Heavenly Father? Shouldn't the thought of
such a thing bring joy and excitement? I began to justify my self. Surely
I was saved. Didn't I work on the bus every Sunday? Didn't I work in the
nursery, teach Sunday School, work with the teens, clean the church, and
even go door knocking every Saturday telling other people about Jesus?
How could a lost person do all these things? I had to be saved - after
all, I married the Preacher's son! It became too heavy of a load for me
to carry. One night after I was sure my husband was asleep, I had a long
talk with the Lord. I did what the Bible says to do and I examined myself
thoroughly as to whether I was in the faith or not. I had to swallow a lot
of pride that night and finally after I got it all down, a flood broke
loose and I realized my lost condition before the Lord. It was as if the
Lord was saying - It's now or never Starr. I still tried to rationalize
things and wondered what would people think. This weighing of the pros
and cons went on for hours, and just when I felt I had enough courage
to rouse my husband out of slumber - the Devil would rock my cradle
again and assure me that I was alright - I married the preacher's son!
Finally, the conviction became so heavy I thought my heart would burst.
I started to cry, hot, swelling tears ran down my cheeks. I realized that
God was wooing me. He had done so much for me, given so much for me, and
I had given nothing back except phoniness. What a waste my life had been -
I began to sob & weep in absolute surrender to God. At the sound of
weeping, my husband awoke and was immediately concerned. Thinking it
was something about the baby or my health, he asked, What's wrong?! The
only 3 words I could muster were, I'm not saved! He was wide awake then
I'll tell you! I knew the words to pray for the Sinner's prayer - I had
shown them to many people myself, but they had never been real to me. But
my husband took me out to our little living room and shared the Scripture
with me and prayed with me. Right there kneeling in front of our sofa I
gave my heart and life to the Lord Jesus. A decision I've never regretted.
It is interesting to note that when our baby boy was due to be born, I
developed Toxemia. The dr. decided for the health of the baby and mine
that they should induce labor. I was induced the whole night with Pitosin,
and NEVER once did I even feel a twinge of labor. They sped up the drops
every few hours and nothing. Late the next morning, I had a pre-placenta
birth, which caused me to have an emergency Caesarean Section. When they
delivered our baby, they said there was only a small portion of placenta
left keeping him alive. If I would have been at home I probably would
have lost the baby and I would have hemorrhaged to death. Praise the Lord
our baby was healthy and my life was spared also.
Now my "baby" boy is 19 and is studying for the ministry at Midwestern
Baptist College! I often wonder what would have happened that day in the
hospital if I had I not accepted the Lord. What if I had stayed in my lost
condition and then died during child birth - I would have gone to Hell. I
would not know the thrill of having a son surrendered to the Lord's
service. I've never heard of another person being saved as a result of
reading or hearing I Timothy 2:15 - but the Lord surely used it in my
life. God has been so good to me all these years. I fail Him miserably
some times but He is good all the time.
He has given my husband & I 20 wonderful years of marriage, & in the
ministry. 3 precious children - all saved and surrendered for full time
service. He's healed our youngest daughter of cancer. I just cannot thank
Him enough for all He's done for me.
Starr Tharp - Isaiah 26:3,4
Mother/ Pastor's wife
Lincoln Ave. Baptist Church |
